Like its sibling, expressing to learn, listening to learn is the most powerful tool for self-fulfillment.
I call them both “the most important tool”, by the way, because it’s a two-way tie for first place.
Are You Ready to Listen?
The opposite of listening to learn is listening to blame. Whereas people who express to blame are usually blaming the other person, people who listen to blame are usually blaming themselves.
For example, if I’m expressing to blame (instead of learn) I’m expressing to discover how to make you “wrong” and if I’m listening to blame (rather than learn) I’m listening to discover how to make myself “right.”
If I listen to discover how to make myself “right”, after all, I’m defending myself. If I’m defending myself, I’m adopting the expresser’s dynamic. If I’m adopting the expresser’s dynamic, I’m in agreement that one of us is “right” and the other “wrong.”
The Answers Are Right Here, If You’re Willing to Listen
When I listen to learn, however, I’m listening to discover what the other person’s perceptions are. A perception is never “wrong”, after all. When someone’s perception does not match my intentions, the solution is rarely found in getting that person to agree that his perception is “wrong.”
Rather, the solution to learning that someone is perceiving me differently than I intended is to learn as much as possible about their perception. Then I can decide if I should alter the expressions of my intention or decide that I can’t do anymore to better convey my intention and simply agree to disagree.
There is no way to accomplish that resolution without listening to learn what your perception is.
And why wouldn’t I do that, considering that listening to learn never erases my ability to eventually say, “You’re wrong”?
Why wouldn’t I first listen to learn, before drawing such a line in the sand?
Listening to Learn Erases All the Stuff You Were Scared Of
If you’re willing to try listening to learn, you have very little to fear. You’ll never surrender your power. You’re not being weak. You’re not exhibiting a lack of confidence.
In fact, there is no greater evidence of confidence than listening to learn. It not only reveals your security, but shows that you’re comfortable with learning. And, as you probably well know, being comfortable with learning means you’re open to discovering that your understandings and perceptions (especially, in this case, about yourself) are open to revision.
I’m Excited to Learn All I Can About Myself
Listening to learn proudly proclaims, “Being fulfilled and successful is more important than being ‘right’; learning the truth about myself, even when shattering an illusion, is always preferable to keeping alive perceptions which aren’t serving me.”
Now you, too, can turn the simple act of listening into a superpower. As long as you’ve been listening here, of course.
And stay tuned to this website for more tips and techniques for using quantum paradigms to align your beliefs and desires and live out your dreams…